I knew nothing about the pain body, In my childhood, teen years and as an adult . The inner child in my psyche, yet, always identified with pain.
As a little child, I unconsciously took on being codependent; a victim and an enabler. To survive, I repressed all feelings including anger.
Pain emerged in my teens believing I wasn’t good enough and I had no right to ask for any of my needs. My inner child within always looked for recognition.
In my teens I had constant critical thoughts of not being good enough. I condemned myself feeling shame that everyone knew my father, the alcoholic. As a child and adult, I felt disconnected from everyone.
Every emotional pain we experience leaves a residue of pain. This residue continues to live within us. When emotionally triggered these past residues will continue to arise.
As long as we believe we are our thoughts we suffer. We then identify as being the pain. We create our suffering by allowing our mind to run unchecked.
When our body of pain activates, we become either a victim or perpetrator. We suffer pain or inflict pain, unconsciously. Look closely at how your thinking or behavior keep feeding the pain. As we become more aware/mindful our pain patterns begin to dissolve.
Learn to recognize your pain body when it shifts from dormant to active. A person or event triggers a strong emotion reaction. Your internal dialogue becomes the voice of pain. All your judgments about people or events become distorted by past emotional pain. You now identify with and take as truth every negative thought the voice tells you. Your pain feeds on this negativity. It grows in strength. You find it impossible to shut down the negative thoughts. After the feeding stops, you feel deleted. The pain has gone dormant. It will arise again in days or weeks.
Our body of pain loves the drama it can stir up in relationships. It provokes the buried pain in our partners and family members. It knows what to say to trigger the emotional hurt within you. Then it feeds on your reaction.
Two awakened pain bodies like hungry ghosts feed on each other. They feed until hours or days later when satiated they go dormant. The pattern repeats until we choose to become more aware and chose to heal.
I wrote this book as a legacy of my inner emotional and spiritual journey of self-growth. I teach people how to heal trauma and transform consciousness.
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Pain emerged in my teens believing I wasn’t good enough and I had no right to ask for any of my needs. My inner child within always looked for recognition.