Six degrees of separation means everyone remains about six steps away, by way of introduction, from any other person on Earth. 12 degrees of separation refers to the maximum separation. Would you like to feel a closer connection to people? I am applying this concept of 12 degrees of separation to codependency personality traits.
A full blown codependency personality separates by 12 degrees maximum from their true inner self or others.
With each degree of recovery from codependency you become one degree closer to a healthy connection with your inner self and others. My experience of recovery takes months and years. Everything now, however, accelerates much faster so your recovery may be much quicker.
You may wonder, What is codependency? Codependency has multiple definitions. To sum it up a codependency personality:
· Puts others needs before their own.
· They deny their own feelings and needs.
· Their self-esteem depends on how well they take care of others.
How many degrees of separation do you find yourself in codependency relationships? Let’s take a look.
The 12 core codependent traits come from the work of John Bradshaw: The Family. Here are the first 4 core codependency traits. Do you identify with any of these?
Recovery from Codependency
1. Do you feel worthless?
· Are you a perfectionist or a controller?
· Are you out of control with your life?
· Afraid to show your needs so you never depend on anyone?
· Are you a people pleaser?
· Are you obnoxious?
Tip for Recovery: Start becoming aware of your feelings and needs. Then practice small steps in expressing your feelings and needs with people you trust.
2. Do you overreact to everything outside of you?
· Does your self-esteem come from others approving of you?
· Constantly find needy people to take care of?
· Do you seek happiness outside of you from others?
Tips for Recovery
Begin using techniques daily to build up your self-esteem inside of you, feeling good about your inner qualities.
3. Do you deny and avoid facing your inner emotional pain?
· Avoid pain through addictions like alcohol, depression, drugs, or over eating etc.?
· Do you fall into the victim trap of hopelessness and powerlessness?
· Deny the truth of your reality?
· Do you isolate yourself from people?
Tip for Recovery: Choose to fully embrace, face, and go through your emotional traumas. The only way out is through.
4. Do you experience extremes?
· Trust everyone or no one?
· Are you all or nothing e.g. sweet or abusive?
· Do you have no opinions or are you critical or judgmental?
· Perceive everything as either black or white?
Tip for Codependency Recovery: Become willing to open up your mind and expand your perception of yourself, your feelings, and others. Be willing to explore the gray area between black and white.
Read Part 2 https://www.emotionalhealthtips.com/codependency-2/
Read Part 3 https://www.emotionalhealthtips.com/codependency-3/
Practice one recovery tip daily.
https://www.emotionalhealthtips.com/codependency-symptoms/
BOOKS
Michael David Lawrience is the author of Emotional Health: The Secret from Drama, Trauma, and Pain His book provides ways to improve emotional health, ease pain, and stress, heal physical and emotional abuse, and spiritual awakening. See the book on Amazon. https://www.amazon.com/Emotional-Health-Secret-Freedom-Trauma/dp/0615479170
Michael as a Residential and Self-Esteem Coach and Mentor has over 15 years of experience teaching teens self-awareness, self-esteem, and self-reliance. See eBook Self Esteem- A Teen’s Guide for Girls https://www.amazon.com/Self-Esteem-Teens-Guide-Michael-Lawrience-ebook/dp/B009L4JLMO.
NEW BOOK
“A Better Life Through Spiritual Growth and Higher Consciousness.”
A Better Life Through Spiritual Growth and Higher Consciousness
Softcover book https://www.amazon.com/Better-Through-Spiritual-Growth-Consciousness/dp/B0DNSF9DFB
EBOOK https://www.amazon.com/Better-Through-Spiritual-Growth-Consciousness-ebook/dp/B0DNQ9VBB8
I wrote this book as a legacy of my inner emotional and spiritual journey of self-growth. I teach people how to heal trauma and transform consciousness.
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