Michael Lawrience

Michael Lawrience

Codependency

Codependency3
Codependency

Relationships: Tips to Improve

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How can you improve your relationships? Codependent Relationships Study the codependent triangle. It is all about control. The Rescuer spend their energy taking care of everyone else. This includes mothers, caregivers, healers, nurses etc. A Rescuer neglects their own needs. Quit often they have no idea what they need. They have little skill nurturing themselves.   A Victim feels sorry for themselves. They sink into a swamp of helplessness. The Victim shows up as our 3 – 5-year-old inner child. This child feeling unloved by a parent believes something is wrong with them. They can live with this trauma the rest of their lives. The Persecutor blames and judges. This includes sexual offenders. The Victim takes on the shame of the Persecutor as their own.   The codependent triangle shows unhealthy relationships. Unhealthy Relationships Do you spend your time looking after others’ problems? Are you caught in their drama? Do you tend to a loved one’s destructive behavior? Does your inner child want to control someone’s behavior Everyone has responsibility for themselves. Check if you get caught up being Over Responsible. Meaningful Relationships As a conscious evolving spiritual person, relationships challenge you. Be clear what types of relationship nurtures you. Continue to heal your shadows and childhood traumas. Others around you may choose to ignore healing. Those operating from codependency may tempt you with friendship for control. When you refuse their “love” they may express anger. Know struggle for control creates tension. Walk away. One Solution: Begin to Feel/Be the Unique Spark that you Are Connect to your Intuition or Higher Self/Divine or your I AM Breath your highest Truth into your Heart Breath from your Heart down your body into the Core of the Earth Also: Learn to Nurture Self –start with pauses during the day Continue Healing Childhood Trauma Codependent Triangle Codependency 03 Karpman https://youtu.be/_keU0-F43hI Read the book, Codependent No More. Stop Controlling Others. Start Caring for Yourself.  8 Articles Codependency https://www.emotionalhealthtips.com/category/codependency How to Heal Trauma and Feeling Over-Responsible https://www.emotionalhealthtips.com/trauma https://www.emotionalhealthtips.com/energy-healing-emotions/ BOOKS Michael David Lawrience is the author of Emotional Health: The Secret from Drama, Trauma, and Pain His book provides ways to improve emotional health, ease pain, and stress, heal physical and emotional abuse, and spiritual awakening. See the book on Amazon. https://www.amazon.com/Emotional-Health-Secret-Freedom-Trauma/dp/0615479170 Michael as a Residential and Self-Esteem Coach and Mentor has over 15 years of experience teaching teens self-awareness, self-esteem, and self-reliance. See eBook Self Esteem- A Teen’s Guide for Girls https://www.amazon.com/Self-Esteem-Teens-Guide-Michael-Lawrience-ebook/dp/B009L4JLMO.  NEW BOOK  “A Better Life Through Spiritual Growth and Higher Consciousness.” A Better Life Through Spiritual Growth and Higher Consciousness Softcover book https://www.amazon.com/Better-Through-Spiritual-Growth-Consciousness/dp/B0DNSF9DFB EBOOK https://www.amazon.com/Better-Through-Spiritual-Growth-Consciousness-ebook/dp/B0DNQ9VBB8 I wrote this book as a legacy of my inner emotional and spiritual journey of self-growth. I teach people how to heal trauma and transform consciousness. FREE eBook KINDLE COPY If you want a copy, send me your email. I will send it as a gift I would appreciate a review. What did you find helpful?  Do you have any suggestions for what you would like in future newsletters? I will do a monthly at the beginning of each month COMMENTS: What did you find helpful?  Do you have any suggestions for what you would like in future newsletters? Do you have suggestions to improve the articles? FREE eBook KINDLE COPY If you want a copy, send me your email. I will send it as a gift. [subscribe2]

codependency1
Codependency

What are Some Codependency Symptoms?

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In codependency, a codependent has a compulsive need to control an otherwise out of control life.  This may be true as I experienced an out of control family life because of the unpredictability of my fathers drinking and anger outbursts.  Some codependency symptoms: I took control by withdrawing and numbing all my feelings. I also knew nothing about setting boundaries. As an adult, my relationships involved multiple codependent behaviors of which I remained unaware. In these relationships, I avoided expressing any feelings for fear of rejection. The women in my life criticized me for lack of feeling. Their criticism confirmed doubts about me. Did I even have the capacity to love at all? In addition, I tended to take care of my partners financial needs and I also had poor boundaries as I had no idea where my personal boundaries ended and other persons began. What are Some Signs of Codependency Symptoms Recovery? I began my recovery in the late 1980’s when I read Melody Beattie’s, Codependent No More. I recognized my codependency and for the next twenty years became less and less codependent.  Like other addictions you may be in recovery for the rest of your life.  I, however, am no longer codependent. I can see codependency as an addiction because I relied on my female partners to feel for me rather than knowing and expressing my own feelings.  Codependents crave and expect a temporary boost of their self-esteem when they take care of some need for their partner.  Like any addiction the outer boost only lasts for a short time and then the codependent looks for another fix. I now love myself, I accept others as they are, I am in touch with and express my feelings, I validate myself rather than searching outside myself for a relationship to feel okay, and I trust trustworthy people. Most important, I am in a relationship, which allows me to grow into all I am capable of being. If you experience codependency, have you had enough suffering to take the steps to codependency symptoms recovery? Read Also How Can Codependency Recovery Reduce Your Suffering? https://www.emotionalhealthtips.com/codependency-recovery/ https://www.emotionalhealthtips.com/recovery-codependency-traits/ BOOKS Michael David Lawrience is the author of Emotional Health: The Secret from Drama, Trauma, and Pain His book provides ways to improve emotional health, ease pain, and stress, heal physical and emotional abuse, and spiritual awakening. See the book on Amazon. https://www.amazon.com/Emotional-Health-Secret-Freedom-Trauma/dp/0615479170 Michael as a Residential and Self-Esteem Coach and Mentor has over 15 years of experience teaching teens self-awareness, self-esteem, and self-reliance. See eBook Self Esteem- A Teen’s Guide for Girls https://www.amazon.com/Self-Esteem-Teens-Guide-Michael-Lawrience-ebook/dp/B009L4JLMO.  NEW BOOK  “A Better Life Through Spiritual Growth and Higher Consciousness.” A Better Life Through Spiritual Growth and Higher Consciousness Softcover book https://www.amazon.com/Better-Through-Spiritual-Growth-Consciousness/dp/B0DNSF9DFB EBOOK https://www.amazon.com/Better-Through-Spiritual-Growth-Consciousness-ebook/dp/B0DNQ9VBB8 I wrote this book as a legacy of my inner emotional and spiritual journey of self-growth. I teach people how to heal trauma and transform consciousness. FREE eBook KINDLE COPY If you want a copy, send me your email. I will send it as a gift I would appreciate a review. What did you find helpful?  Do you have any suggestions for what you would like in future newsletters? I will do a monthly at the beginning of each month COMMENTS: What did you find helpful?  Do you have any suggestions for what you would like in future newsletters? Do you have suggestions to improve the articles? FREE eBook KINDLE COPY If you want a copy, send me your email. I will send it as a gift. [subscribe2]

codependent recovery
Codependency

Codependency3: How To Best Express and Heal Inner Child

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Part 3 continues with the last four codependency traits where Part 2 left off. I am suggesting a full blown codependency personality separates by 12 degrees maximum from their true inner self or others. With each degree of recovery from codependency you become one degree closer to a healthy connection with your inner self and others. To sum up a codependency personality: · Puts others needs before their own. · They deny their own feelings and needs. · Their self-esteem depends on how well they take care of others. The 12 core codependency traits come from the work of John Bradshaw: The Family. See the last 4 core codependent traits. How many degrees of separation do you find yourself in codependency relationships? 9. Enmeshed Boundaries · Your personal emotional boundaries entangle with another person · You lack awareness of you own needs e.g. being tired or hungry · You expect others to know your feelings and needs · You give up on yourself · You strive to live up to others expectations · You need to always be in relationship or else you avoid relationships Tip for Recovery: Start to become aware of your feelings and needs. Express your feelings and needs.

codependency
Codependency

Codependency2: How To Best Set Boundaries And Recover

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Codependency  I am suggesting a full blown codependency personality separates by 12 degrees maximum from their true inner self or others. With each degree of recovery from codependency you become one degree closer to a healthy connection with your inner self and others. Part 2 continues where Part 1 left off. To sum up a codependency personality: · Puts others needs before their own. · They deny their own feelings and needs. · Their self-esteem depends on how well they take care of others. The 12 core codependency traits come from the work of John Bradshaw: The Family. How many degrees of separation do you find yourself in codependent relationships? See another 4 core codependency traits. 5. Do you tolerate increasing intolerable behavior? · Are you growing more addicted to something or someone? · Do you continue staying in an abusive relationship? · Are you becoming physically or emotionally sick because of an unhealthy relationship? Tip for Recovery: Begin setting personal boundaries by saying No. Talk to friends. You may at some point have to gain enough courage to leave a relationship, if it doesn’t improve.

Codependency

Codependency: How To Best Feel And Recover

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Six degrees of separation means everyone remains about six steps away, by way of introduction, from any other person on Earth. 12 degrees of separation refers to the maximum separation. Would you like to feel a closer connection to people? I am applying this concept of 12 degrees of separation to codependency personality traits. A full blown codependency personality separates by 12 degrees maximum from their true inner self or others. With each degree of recovery from codependency you become one degree closer to a healthy connection with your inner self and others. My experience of recovery takes months and years. Everything now, however, accelerates much faster so your recovery may be much quicker.

Codependency

Codependency Behavior: Is It Ruining Your Life 2?

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In Codependent Behavior – Part 1, I gave you a brief summary of my personal challenge with codependency behavior. Five main areas of codependency behavior: 1. Inability to recognize our needs. 2. Lack of taking care of ourselves, fulfilling our own needs. 3. Inability to know how we feel. 4. Lack of skill or fear of expressing our feelings. 5. Poor personal boundaries. Fear of standing up and saying “No.” I will soon talk about the behavior of some Indian men known as “Mama’s Boy. I address this in reference to Indian women and how they might better handle it to achieve better emotional health for themselves. This understanding of men’s behavior, however, can assist women of any culture.

Codependency-Chained
Codependency

Codependent Behavior: Is It Ruining Your Life?

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Although this article is written for the East Indian culture, the codependent behavior principles apply to all cultures. I am a white male born in Canada and now living in the United States for half of my life. I only recognized my codependent behavior 2/3’s of the way through life. Codependency had been running and ruining my life for all that time without me knowing. It took another 20 years overcoming codependent behavior. Although I have visited India two times for spiritual development, I have little understanding of how codependent behavior affects Indian men or women. I apologize for this; however, the areas of codependency remain the same regardless of our culture. Therefore, take what I say and apply it to your situation where you can. I am led, to understand that some Indian men have behavior described as the “Mama’s Boy.” I will talk about that later. I now give you a brief summary of my personal challenge with codependent behavior.

Codependency2
Codependency

Men How to Get Out of a Codependent Relationship?

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It’s often obvious that a needy, demanding woman who clings to a man has codependent tendencies. However, a relationship consists of two people, and HE is no less responsible.  In fact, his behavior can also be labeled “codependent.”  Two people who have codependent tendencies may act in opposite ways: While one is needy and drains her partner, the other may have a enlarged sense of responsibility to his partner, and is overly sensitive to her needs and demands. In fact, people with opposing codependent styles tend to attract each other. These opposing psychological profiles have been termed “takers” and “caretakers.” Codependent relationships are complicated, and they’re often characterized by manipulation, lack of boundaries, repressed emotions, emotional volatility, jealousy issues, verbal abuse, etc..  Both partners tend to have complicated back-stories, which often serve to justify abnormal behavior.  If you’re a man feeling stuck in a codependent relationship, realize that your happiness is worth the effort it takes to move on.

Codependency4
Codependency

How Can Codependency Recovery Reduce Your Suffering?

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Codependency Behaviors I believed I developed codependency behaviors to cope with my fathers drinking, which resulted in constant fighting between my father and mother for twenty years until they divorced. I never felt safe to express my thoughts and feelings so I retreated inward and became invisible, the lost child. I wore a stoic stone face as a mask as if I were okay. My heart also became as numb as a stone. It has been said that a persona with codependency has a compulsive need to control an otherwise out of control life. This may be true as I experienced an out of control family life because of the unpredictability of my father’s drinking and anger outbursts. I took control by withdrawing and numbing all my feelings. I hid my thoughts even from my mother who assumed I was okay because I never expressed anything.

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